Internet Vegetable : (n) /~In'tehnet Veg'itebl ~/,
defn 1. Any living form, mostly human, capable of manipulating computers and with connection to the Internet, and spending excessive amounts of time online, engaged in activities whose productivity, is matched only by those of ineffectual organizations run by the Indian government.
(Ah!, that should make one Mr.Webster proud. .. Sob..Sob )
So, getting back to the subject at hand, here are a list of classic symptoms of an Internet Vegetable. Though not all of them are necessary to identify, and ascertain a I.V, most of them occur, together.
- Owning, or writing blogs regularly, and rather obsessively with excessively long posts.
- Compulsive tendency to scribe the even most miniscule incident into a elaborate blog post(like this one for example) .
- Visiting, Creating, Owning, or having knowledge of arcane websites with content only as much as ..., say.... Zilch.
- Posting on the same blog(s), multiple times, within 24 hours, inspite of an exam the next day.
- Ability to recite, url's with more than 200 characters from memory.
- Celebrating September 6, with a pagan ceremony, just to commemorate Google's birthday.
- Also accompanied by insomnia, somnabulism, sleep-talking, sleep-typing.
- Carving out a personal insignias of penguins, lizards, etc... from candy bars.
- Thinking, all problems in life would have simple answers like Yes, No, and Cancel.
- Always looking to type Ctrl-Z, when it dawns, you have messed up something bigtime!
PS: if you have all the above symptoms, and are proud of them, then you are .. Oh.... Worse......, an Internet MOLE.